Promise me this...

Maybe it’s just me, but promises are a big deal. A promise according to the dictionary is a declaration that something will or will not be done, given, etc., by one. If you are going to make a promise that means that it is something of importance and value to you. So why do people break promises? I understand that a drunken promise may not hold much value but sober ones definitely do. If you ask me you shouldn’t make a promise if you don’t have the intention of keeping. Or if you can’t keep it there should a good reason for it. If you take the time and effort to make the promise have the decency to follow through and be good on your word. Remember when we were younger our parents promised that they’d take us to Chuck E. Cheese and then they didn’t and how upset we were. I feel that same way when a friend breaks a promise to me now. I don’t make promises that I can’t keep so I expect the same of those around me… is that too much to ask? All I'm asking is that you follow through with a promise you are making or if you can't don't make it.

Are all friendships meant to be forever?

Losing touch with friends seems to be a part of life, its not like we are still best friends with people we knew in first grade. I’m sure some of you are, but we become friends with people in life and then people move, we grow apart or we just lose contact. In either case why is it more difficult to get out of a bad friendship than a bad relationship? If you are in a bad relationship your friends will be the first to say you need to dump him/her and you can do so much better. But when you are in a bad friendship that is no longer beneficial to either party where are your friends to tell you that you can do better and that he/she has changed and you are better without them? Do we hold our friends at a higher standard than our significant others? Friendships are a type of a relationship so why should it be any different? As strange as it may sound, I definitely have some friendships from my past that were good while they lasted but I no longer talk to them or confide in them. It’s somewhat refreshing in the sense that you are not longer putting for the effort into something that isn’t growing. Much like a relationship all friendships can’t last forever, right?

Enough with the PDA

Is it me or are more and more people partaking in PDA now that its getting warmer out or am I just noticing it more? I'm talking about Public Displays of Affection not to be mistaken with Personal Digital Assitants. It seems that everywhere I go I see people making out and all over each other. Is it really necessary? I understand that you are in love and I’m happy for you, but do you really need to force the rest of the world to see it? If we wanted to see people hooking up you can watch tv, a movie or porn for that matter. Can’t the privacy of your own home be enough space for you to display affection? I understand that you may want to hold hands or give a little kiss in public, but anything beyond that is just creating a public show. Having to show everyone how much in love you are through PDA must say something about your relationship, almost as if you are trying to justify it. So the next time you are thinking about being all over your significant other think who's watching...

Listening is a skill

I’m sure it has happened to all of us, we are talking to someone and you ask them then something they say ‘what’ and then before you get to repeat what you just said, they respond. I know it has happened to me and I’m sure that I’ve probably been guilty of it a few times. Are we really that self-involved that we are too focused on what wear going to say? I remember my 7th grade teacher saying "listening is a skill", and its something that has always stuck with me. When conversing with someone, you need to listen, comprehend and then respond. More often than not we listen and only hear what we want to hear and then move straight to responding, without comprehending. Is it human nature to always be defensive and ready to respond instead of just taking it for what it is? Is it a default in the brain that we automatically say "what" before anything else? I saw a shirt that explained it best "half listening as usual". So the next time you are talking to someone, listen to what is being said and take a second before you respond, its amazing how much more you will understand.

“There are people, who instead of listening to what is being said to the, are already listening to what they are going to say themselves.”

City appreciation

Why do we wait until we have friends or family in town to take advantage of the "touristy" things our city has to offer? I'm sure that many people that live in Chicago have never been on the architecture boat tour, walked through Millennium Park, seen a concert a Ravinia, gone to the Lincoln Park Zoo, gone to a sporting event... the list goes on. Why don't we take advantage of what the city has to offer regardless of who's in town? Chicago like many other cities has a variety of events and activities taking place throughout the year regardless of the weather, but its not until you have guests in town that you do new things. Why not do new things with the friends that live here? It would be like a new adventure in exploring your city, so that the next time you have friends or family in town you can recommend something that is truly unique to your city. Are we only willing to splurge in our city when we have a reason? Is living life not reason enough?

Minor changes…huge consequences

If you could go back and make changes in your life would you? What would you change? Personally I wouldn’t want to go back and change anything because the people I've met and the experiences I've been through have made me who I am today. My life isn't perfect, but its my life and I'm happy with it and the way its going. Yeah, I it would be great if I had a job right now, but then I wouldn't be able to write my blog or do the random freelance work that I'm working on. Change one thing no matter how small and it has major impact on the next outcome in life. I may not have met the people that have become an important part of my life and who I am. I wouldn’t have the same memories that I have with my friends and family and all the good times and bad times that we’ve been through. Most of all, if I was to change my past, I wouldn’t be who I am today. Everything that has happened to me from birth till now has made me who I am and has given me the life lessons that help me make everyday decisions in my life. So think about it, if you were to go back in time and make a change in your life.. would it be worth it? Would you be happier? Do you have more to gain or lose in the change?

It has been said something as small as the flutter of a butterfly’s wing can ultimately cause a typhoon halfway around the world. - Chaos Theory

Want to do or ought to do...

Growing up our parents always told us what was wrong and what was right. As we grow older we know what we ought to do but we also know what we want to do. So the question is how should we live our lives? Should we do what we want to do or what society expects us to do? Who are we living our lives for? We've all seen the person in their mid-twenties who's life still seems to be controled by their parents. Shouldn't we come to a point at which we stand our own ground and make the decisions that impact our lives? I'm not saying you shouldn't respect your parents, since they are the ones that brought you into the world and taught you the the basics of life, morals, beliefs and right from wrong. But when do we become indiviuals that think and act for one's self? Our parents teach us the foundation and once in a while it may need to be "renovated" based on what you experienced in life. We go into the "real world" armed with what we've been told we "ought" to do but and we go through life we come to realize that we want to do something outside of the normal. The problem we then face is that when we do something we "want" to do society looks down upon us. There is no right or wrong way to live your life as long as you are happy and doing things that make you happy while adding something posivite to society without hurting others you are on the right track.

“If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured or far away.” ~Henry David Thoreau